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HLF - RPG Group - Star Wars Edition 56k - stay away!



Ivan the Space Biker's Personal Aid

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#16 Posted 23 January 2017 - 03:50 AM

damn, Robocop does better when he spends sexy time with waifu
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Hupsakee!

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#17 Posted 23 January 2017 - 01:56 PM

Midway through that fight, Ró bluff-laughed at the klingon boss.

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"Listen here, ura-bastard! (his real name was Ur-Bataar) call off your pitiful dogs, they are unworthy of fighting us!"
And weirdly, it sounded true, they didn't land a single shot on us and we methodically blew up, disintegrated and blasted each one in rapid succession.
Ura-bastard He didn't even have time to respond with his own laughter when his warrior's corpses were making a mess of things, bleeding all over the throne room floor.

"Hah, you are as powerful as the prophecy foretold! Good show, outlanders. Now, follow me to the device"
Device, eh? Well at least we were alone with him, and weren't expecting any more combat surprises.
"It has been foretold that you will help us in our glorious victory against the pitiful Altiri (blue skinned idiots from the other side of the planet), and
activate...the omega device! Posted Image

So there we were, in a secret room of the palace, with a giant bomb the size of a space-whale, and after a cursory examination, Mathus figured out that:

1) Part of the bomb was a green deadly gas canister, potent enough to kill any living beings on half a planet (convenient)
2) The other part was a dark matter bomb, also known as planet cracker.
3) A timer had been set weeks ago by the imperials who installed this here, and it had 24 hours remaining.

Yes, We were now Jack Bauer. *blip bloop blip bloop* 23:59:59

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Ró Jen did his best to convince, plead, cheat, coerce Ura-bastard, but to no avail. He did almost get stabbed when he lost his cool and made fun of his stupid klingon voice.

To everyone's surprise, it was Mathus who managed, through a thorough trough of technobabble and other nonsense, made the bastard understand that this bomb was bad news for the entire planet, not only the blue morons, and that we needed to dispose of this immediately.
He was so convincing that he felt some sort of...force work through him, binding him and the universe together, or somesuch ancient religious silliness, but that feeling passed quickly and Ura-bastard stated making arrangements to get us back to our ship so we could repair it, and grab the bomb and drop it off into outer space, or other safe things.

22:00:00

That was a long drive, now to diagnose the ship

16:00:00

Yup, see this big hole here? that shouldn't be here, so we plugged the hole or something. Listen I don't know, ask Mathus, he's the mechanic.

15:45:00

Continuing him being on a roll, Mathus expertly flew us back to the klingon captal city, and while grunts loaded the WMD onto our light freighter, we had a little chat with ura-bastrard, and conference-called in the Altiri king as well.

The Annari (klingon) leader talked of peace, man it almost brought tears to one's eye, and the King Midas V of the Altiri was quite happy to hear it...a bit too eager to accept, we thought.
Ró took him off speakerphone and told Midas that we were aware of his "plan for peace" (bio-warfare), and that Ura-Bastard here was trying to make a real peace treaty, and through a show of good faith, we NOT using a weapon of mass destruction to kill his enemy's entire population, so how about you cut the crap, OK? play nice. Also we'll check up on your peoples in the future, and

Surprising even the Mr_Filament our GM, it all went smoothly. With lots of time to spare, we took off the planet, made a short jump to a nearby failed star-system and tossed the dark matter bomb at a bunch of asteroids. *GLOOP* was the sound it made as half the asteroid belt was destroyed (we got 1 million XP for killing 70 trillion asteroid worms, hooray!)

Ur-Bataar had rewarded us with a crate full of treasure, including intriguing crystals that would need further study, and we were safely in space now, still in the unknown regions. Time for a quick call and situation update to my main man Dep Snortrip. I explained the situation, and humble-bragged taht planet Altiria/Annaris was now free of imperial influence and oh by the way we ended a thousand years of civil war. Dep, in his usual exhuberant fashion, gushed over our accomplishments and put us in direct contact with the first reasonable rebel commander we had ever heard:
Bren Derlin Posted Image

He rewarded us richy and offered to buy us a space-beer the next time we were in his sector. He also wanted to put us on some sort of rebel hero mailing list, but we declined the honour. Sounded like a bad idea to maintain a list of all effective rebel agents, sounded suspisciously like the list of imperial plans we'd captured in our 1st adventure.

Still, cash money is nice.


Moral of the story: don't judge an alien by its cover, civilized seeming blueskins may turn out to be genocidal maniacs, and strightforward warrior races may end up more honourable and peaceful than expected.

It had been a good day.
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A Vvaardenfell sunset



G-Man Personal Aid

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#18 Posted 23 January 2017 - 03:27 PM

God, I laugh every time I see that goofy face
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Former HLF Staff, 6/6/2017 - 9/5/2019



Ivan the Space Biker's Personal Aid

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#19 Posted 14 February 2017 - 07:23 AM

I was suppose to write a story about our latest adventures, I will do so later, in the mean time I decided to draw a scene which only makes sense to those who attended:



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Hupsakee!

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#20 Posted 14 February 2017 - 01:26 PM

Oh man, that was one hell of a moment. squishy squishy pics and it did happen :good:
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A Vvaardenfell sunset



G-Man Personal Aid

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#21 Posted 14 February 2017 - 09:24 PM

It was a shame too, because he seemed so reasonable and helpful until that moment!
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Former HLF Staff, 6/6/2017 - 9/5/2019



Hupsakee!

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#22 Posted 26 February 2017 - 08:05 PM

We had a nice housekeeping episode today with sui-/CCPP, updating the character sheets, and did an extensive tutorial run. Robocop is now deadlier than ever before. :good:

Where Inim was, is his own secret. Please try to stay in touch with Doodle, steam group events, IRC, email...whatever...something.
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A Vvaardenfell sunset



G-Man Personal Aid

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#23 Posted 27 February 2017 - 12:41 AM

Yo, sorry I was the asshole this week. I left on Friday for a somewhat impromptu weekend trip and I honestly just didn't think that far ahead. :o
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Former HLF Staff, 6/6/2017 - 9/5/2019



Ivan the Space Biker's Personal Aid

Posts: 6,950

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#24 Posted 28 February 2017 - 04:52 PM

View PostInimitable, on 26 February 2017 - 07:41 PM, said:

Yo, sorry I was the asshole this week. I left on Friday for a somewhat impromptu weekend trip and I honestly just didn't think that far ahead. :o


YAY finally its not me!
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G-Man Personal Aid

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#25 Posted 06 March 2017 - 10:07 PM

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Ro's pants shitting not pictured.
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Steam ID || NNID: Inimitable
Former HLF Staff, 6/6/2017 - 9/5/2019



Ivan the Space Biker's Personal Aid

Posts: 6,950

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#26 Posted 10 March 2017 - 05:04 PM

View PostInimitable, on 06 March 2017 - 05:07 PM, said:

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Ro's pants shitting not pictured.


If movies have taught me anything, it's that throwing a character from one speeding vehicle to another is totally doable, and I was proven right!

Also, we now have our very own Ooutlanders mascot: Mr Squishy! oh what adventures we will have!
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Hupsakee!

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#27 Posted 12 March 2017 - 03:27 PM

Behold the new and improved Ooutlander ship interior, yes, the differences are subtle, but significant.
  • I managed to erase some of the prewritten grey text on the tiles so the rooms are easier to allocate freely.
  • Mr. Squishy has been brought aboard and is safe in his own little room, and the crew is safe from him.
  • Ró Jen got a crate of grenade parts brought aboard.


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A Vvaardenfell sunset



G-Man Personal Aid

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#28 Posted 14 March 2017 - 01:18 PM

Synopsis of the great floating tree fight coming soon. It turns out stormtroopers aren't all that hard to kill!

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Steam ID || NNID: Inimitable
Former HLF Staff, 6/6/2017 - 9/5/2019



Hupsakee!

Posts: 20,994

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#29 Posted 19 March 2017 - 04:52 PM

OK, time for a little retrospective, since we haven't gotten a summary in a while.


Ró Jen (Brumi), Mathus (Inim) and CCPP aka Robocop (sui) left the Klingon planet with a chest full of gold and a head full of memories, contented with a job well done.

Filly took a few weeks off and I was GMing for the next two sessions.

SIDEQUEST 2
2017-02-21



Cruising between planets, his feet on the dashboard, Mathus the designated pilot failed to notice a blinking red light, and The Ooutlander (YT-2400 Light Freighter) suddenly drops out of hyperspace.

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In a decaying orbit around an unknown planet, with no hyperdrive, and under attack from unknown spaceships? Welcome to star wars, baby. Mathus and Robocop put up a valiant fight, but the hyperdrive fire in the engine room goes unnoticed for too long, gets out of control, and the ship soon begins crashing towards the planet.
ESCAPE POD TIME!
TRY NOT TO CRASH THE ESCAPE POD!
FAIL!

*cut to black*

Mathus and Robocop Wake up in a prison cell, on a planet where apparently people have blue skin and 4 arms. They discuss at length whether or not they should escape this prison. This prison which has clearly been elaborately constructed around them with many traps and other adventurous features. Fortunately, they do decide a breakout, and start punching the guard for his keys and wrist computer. Robocop even decides to recruit the clearly insane psycho-killer in the same cell block as they are (scroll up to see the hand-drawn portrait of the now famous Mr. squishy, who likes to squish the life out of anyone he meets). Trying to rip out Robocop's back molars, Mr squishy instead gets his own jaw severely squashed, and he is pacified for now.

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The escape attempt proceeds in the similar vein as the earlier space battle, valiant but vain. They are all soon recaptured, and almost as son, taken to trial.

The courtroom is a grand place, with majestic columns supporting high ceilings, and an immaculate glass cupola above it. The effect is slightly marred by The Ooutlander being crashed through its side wall.

The local high magistrate walks in, his name is Le’var Burt’on (a light chuckle is heard and eye-rolling is perceived)

Ró Jen usually doing the talking, and him being absent, it was a natural dick move to have Robocop the barely literate droid, and mathus the space-nerd defend themselves in court, but they did so with surprising eloquence and efficacy.

On the charge of space piracy: "Your honour, we just dropped in, and you started shooting at us". Thanks to their semi-incompetence, they dind't blow up any ships. NOT GUILTY
On the charge of willing destruction of private property, as in, ramming your ship into this esteemed courthouse "Your honour..,.you shot us down we were crashing!" NOT GUILTY
Trying to escape from prison is not a crime, as all self-aware beings yearn for freedom, but assaulting public servants is a crime! "Your honour, we used minimal force, and didn't actually kill anyone! Also we stoipped Mr squishy from hurting anyone else!" NOT GUILTY

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So yeah, the trial was going really well, up until the point that everyone failed their perception checks (Later on, Robocop would sink massive amounts of XP points into upping his perception) and dind't notice stormtroopers grav-chuting down from the glass-cupola in the ceiling. Not a good day. But it could still be saved.
Finally, our heroes won a battle, helped by the non-lethal weaponsry picked off some of the guards in the room, and Leva Burton himself stabbed the stromtrooper sergeant, ending this mini-conflict.

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SIDEQUEST 2 part 2
2017-03-05



Next session, Picking up where we left off, medics arrive by skybulance, and so does Ró Jen, finally using his healing powers. Levar Burton asks our heroes to find out where this attack came from, a long bit of exposition later, there's some sort of crime boss who's been in contact with the imperials, trying to overthrown Levar Burton. The bad guy's name is Davik Dook.

Mathus and Robocop decide on a frontal assault-SWAT style, and thy ask Ró to finally join them again, he's been having a bit too much of an easy life, sweet-talking himself out of this whole trial thing, and being all cozy with the medical staff while others rotted in prison.

Flash forward to a typical star wars cantina, but built into the side of a mountain like a hobbit pub. FLASHBANG! PEW OPEW LASERS! PEW PEW! ARGH! RUN! FLASHBANG! OH SHIT! the assault goes spectacularly well.

Meanwhile, a lone NPC SWAT trooper is in at the cantina's back door, and holding Mr Squishy the bloodthirsty maniac on a leash, and they provide an amazing amount of diversion and a surprisungly capable backup fighting force. The SWAT team emember is seriously thinking about retirement, though.

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Soon, Robocop, and Mathus hit Davik Dook's bodyguards Goro and Gora.
Aha, finally an exceiting challenge for our heroes, no more cannon fodder, no more handicapping them with prison restraints, now the battle can begi-Goro and Gora are down for the count :blink: Well that was quick (that's what she said). Robocop packs quite a punch.

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Davik tries to escape on the speeder in his office, but our heroes, the Ooutlanders, are on his tail. Jumping on nearby swoop bikes, they quickly catch up to him, and Robocop, in what is becoming his signature manoeuvre, throws Ró Jen onto Davik's hover-car. (scroll up to inim's post to see it in action). Davik is soon stopped, and being a coward, he confesses to everything, gives the heroic trio a mysterious stolen datapad and a holo-communicator.

THE PLOT CATCHES UP! Inquisitor Krassus (the shadowy figure who's been trying to expand the empire) answers the comms call, and is furious and angry and furiously angry, in a creepy cold way, at the Ooutlander crew meddling with his plans for galactic domination.
"If you want to save her, it's too late, come no further".

*roll credits, pass Go, receive 45 XP* (We later noticed that this is way way overpaying in XP, and we closed that tap).

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Our official GM Mr_Filament is back! huzzah!
The real adventure resumes
2017-03-14



Hey ho, hey ho, back to space we go!

While Ró Jen marvels over the grenade workbench he acquired, Mathus finally has time to rummage through the treasure chest the Klingon king gave us. Well well well, what's this? a lightsaber crystal? fascinating.

Mathus suddenly becomes extremely reclusive, and hides in his room, doing all kinds of mechanical nerdy things to his broken lightsaber he also picked up on the Klingon planet. He manages to get it to work, but only with very limited power, since the power crystal is cracked.

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Examining the tablet we found, it's of rebel (or new republic) design, and has one set of coordinates written on it, we can't make out much more info, so we take off in its direction.

Arriving at a planet deep deep in the unknown regions, a planet so remote it doesn't even have a name, so we designate it alphanumerically: D4G084H. A swampy place.

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Now, let's read from Ró Jen's personal holonet-blog:

lots of technical and lore-based sleuthing in the jungle, we find a rebel transponder beacon, and some ancienty weird stone carvings
guiding us through the swamps
OH NO! *GASP*! a 2 metre wide river! our deadliest enemy!
I figure, better not take a risk trying to jump, better have Robocop throw me over
...Nice fumble, jackass, throws me right into the middle. To nobody's surprise, a tentacle grabs me, tries to drag me under. Fortunately, robocop uses his spider-bot rope cannon to drag me out and Mathus shoots the tentacle, we're all safe and sound on the riverbank.

This is when a giant tentacle comes out of the water and we witness Robocop being dragged into the depths
Robocop just got spit out far into the air and landed softly in the bushes of the swampworld.

yes, filly tried to make us think CCPP dead for the sake of a dagobah R2D2 reference
:|
welp, we try, but we literally are not allowed to roll and try to find or save Robocop
fuck it, not like he can drown or be eaten

meta-gaming wise, he's probably fine

so we move forward, and Robocop is ejected out of the water. Thus we are reunited slightly anticlimactically.

More sleuthing, we find some quite impressive ruins with 3D modelled trees and everything.

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Krassus is there, taunting us from atop a column:
"Mwahahah, I have captured this rebel officer, you'll never get her alive"

...Who? OOOhhhhh, it's...whatshername, the person that we as characters in this universe totally remember, but that our dumb human players don't, because it's been 4 months. Rebel officer that Ró punched in the face, because she was an incompetent bitch who almost got him killed twice in the same day.

Brynn, that's her name!

So, yeah, Big bad guy Krassus has some rebel officer he thinks we care about captured, fair enough.
We open fire on the stromtroopers, and with a little difficulty, take them all out, but barely limp out of the battle alive. DAmn, we are not as tyough as we thought we were. But thanks to stimpacks and judicious medpac healing, we make it out OK.

when the smoke clears, the stormtroopers are all down, Krassus has escaped force knows where, and we've rescued the damsel in distress...the extremely ungrateful damsel in distress.
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A Vvaardenfell sunset



Hupsakee!

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#30 Posted 19 March 2017 - 07:06 PM

This week's adventure was very investigation heavy.

We looked for clues in the ruins that we just had a battle in, and it was damn complicated, we spent 2 hours, the entire sesssion finding extremely cryptic information, while mr squishy looked for mushrooms and berries.

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Also it was finally firmly established that despite Ró's best efforts to be polite, helpful and diplomatic, Brynn still irratonally hates hates him, seemingly for more reasons than their previous encounter (when he punched her after she did her best to get him killed).
Ró concluded, after trying to get her help, and finally having a minor breaktrhough, that she was not only bitchy, but also incompetent, and power-hungry, a terrible combination. She was sent on her way, towards our ship, to sit quietly. A minor personal victory.

Examining the ruins, we found: a 5000 year old tourist information board in the form of a droid, HK-40K, who was of limited help, and a bunch of ruins to explore.

In summary, we know or suspect the following:
  • Huge pilgrimage statue to [space jesus], actual name still unknown, who taught lightsaber combat and probably force use to the locals, and had some kind of uprising and went all alexander the great, "civilizing" several planets throughout the outer regions.
  • We are at some sort of pilgrimage location, one of many on a route, no idea where the previous or the next stop are.
  • Knights of the eternal throne are a thing, mysterious faction from the past, and apparently still active in the unknown regions, Ró heard about them from an old spacer
  • Monks of the dark erected a dark obelisk in this place, with some force stuff going on, maybe a force darkside offshoot of space jesus, maybe space jesus's old followers, still active but in very small numbers in today's galaxy. They like anarchy and chaos.
  • Something about the heat death of the universe
  • Big asylum for the dark addled, the insane.
  • Small building for the loyal, followers of space jesus.


Cryptic much? The future will tell us if we wasted our time, or if it starts to make sense soon.

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A Vvaardenfell sunset

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